“Slugs” is a poem by George T. Watt and is listed among best 2014 Scottish poems. The poem is written entirely in Scots, and it can be a bit difficult to read. The speech patterns of the deep south are very, very similar to Scots, so if you are from one of the Southern states in the U.S., understanding the poem will be less difficult than if you are from one of the Northern states.
What we tend to refer to as the “redneck” language is, in actuality, the remnants of the Scots that was spoken when the Scottish first settled in these mountains. I have a Scottish heritage, as I’m a descendant of the MacGregor clan, and I think it is important to embrace my heritage.
Now, here is “Slugs.”
George T. Watt
Div slugs ken thay ar universally reviled?
div thair mithers warn thaim,
kep awa frae the beer
an that it’s nae trui fit thay sey aboot saut
it disnae hairden yer arteries.
Or ar thay left tae fen fur thairsels
me an yer paw, we’r fur the guidlife.
Fan A mow the girse
fitwey hae worms nae learnt
kep yer heids doun?
Fur years A’d toss thaim aside
juist tae save thaim frae the blade
but thay nivver developed wings
evolution’s nae aa it’s cracked up tae be
mibbie Darwin haesnae thocht it oot richt.
A ponner thay things as a chyave awaa
Ein HeldenLeben’s nae me,
A’m fur the fit sudjer, heid down
rakin up the girse cuttins fur the slaw decline,
but the spuggies chirp awaa in the buss,
the daffies glint thair ee as A pass
thankfu fur the wee tait seaweed
that kep the slugs at bay.